Saturday, December 17, 2005


I want a different life. Just for awhile. I am just so sick of feeling like I am in a nightmare and just waiting to wake up. It gets old. Even the happiness is not complete, and I am tired of it. What the hell did we do to deserve this??


Dh's work schedule is in the way again this month. The plan was to have sex every other day until I O, but since I haven't been O'ing anyway, guess it doesn't matter. I will be in SC the day after Christmas, and we will probably be there until the 6th, so no temping or charting for awhile.


For the first time, dh will be off of work for Caleb's birthday. That's why we will be in SC.


I absolutely adore Evan. I love that kid so much that it hurts physically sometimes. In the middle of playing, he stopped, looked at me, and came over to me like he had something VERY important to do. Then he climbed up, and gave me a big kiss. He never gives kisses. EVER.

He's also getting 3 teeth at once. Give the kid a break! He just got over being sick, and now *3* teeth??? This is how it goes with him though. No teeth at all for months, then all at one time. He handles it amazingly well.

He never ceases to amaze me. The same kid that will NOT drink milk, in fact he has always spit it back out, drank a cup of chocolate milk today. I have tried it all before, strawberry milk, chocolate milk, vanilla milk, plain milk. He wouldn't drink ANY of it, and if it got into his mouth he would NOT swallow it. But tonite, I got out a big boy cup with no lid, and split my milk with him. He drank the whole thing. BY HIMSELF. Can't wait to show dh tomorrow!


I need gift suggestions. One of the girls dh works with will be feeding our cat and getting our mail while we are gone. What should I do for her?


My best friend lives in SC. She called me tonite to tell me that Friday while she was at work a woman came in selling ornaments to raise money to buy disposeable cameras for one of the local hospital. Her son was stillborn in Febuary and she was doing it in his memory. She started talking to the woman and asked her son's name........ You guessed it.......Caleb. They talked for awhile, and my friend bought an ornament for me. She also got her email address etc. for me. Funny how people fall into your lives sometimes.


At 11:52 PM, Blogger Catherine said...

Yes, my friend, it IS funny how people fall into your life sometimes. {{{hugs}}}

At 10:54 AM, Blogger Lola said...

If I could wish for one superpower it would be the power to make everything better for all of us infertiles/miscarriers. I'm sorry it's hard going right now. You must miss Caleb so terribly, I can't even imagine.

I'm glad you have Evan to give you joy.

At 11:47 AM, Blogger kate said...


I know, sometimes it feels like if you could just take a break from all this for a few days....sigh...

At 3:56 PM, Blogger MB said...

It's funny how all of us seem to be in a little bit of a funk. We all have reasons to be happy...great ones even. Yet, the sadness creeps back in time and again.

It is amazing how we find each other. Suddenly, we have created a little community. Good things do happen.

At 5:59 PM, Blogger the ockers said...

Thanks for stopping in and leaving such kind words for me on my blog. sorry I would have emailed you back directly but I couldn't find your e-address again. Anyway, I want to wish you the best of luck over this xmas and in the future. happy holidays.


Post a Comment

<< Home